The Mushroom Killers

In short, we whooped them.

In long, we snuck through the ventilation shaft and hid right inside the front doors. Mushroom Mel himself arrived and cut the ribbon and walked inside. I unleashed a double backflip-kick to his upper head (he has two, and looks like two button mushrooms stacked on top of one another). Anyway, I accidentally knocked him right back through the doors and into the crowd of his very own mushroom maulers. He shouted “charge” and we were beset upon by a fight a scene so horrific, they might have to rate my next documentary “R”

After the dust and mushroom parts settled, we noticed that the villain himself was missing. We took pursuit, but after we realized Raddish boy's right leg was missing, we decided to go back and then make a quick foray into the hospital. He should be fine in the morning.

--Onion Man